Weighing in!

Weight- 157.2 lbs
Fat %- 26.5%
Water %- 52.6%

I kissed the 160s goodbye and I'm never looking back! :)

Today me and Scot are going out to eat with some of his family. I'm going to order salad because today is not my cheat day! I also want to try and work out a little bit today/tonight whenever I feel up to it. At the moment my back feels OK but I'm afraid it'll start hurting again. It could be possibly from sitting on the floor when I play with Jadyn but I don't really know anyway around that. She needs lots of floor time so she can start crawling and I want to be down there paying attention to her and helping the best I can.

Perhaps I'll try increasing my water intake again. When I was pregnant I was sure to drink 64 oz a day. That's a lot! Now I drink maybe half that. I still have a goal to increase my water weight to about 56%. Its slowly been rising but I think I can do more to increase it.

Never the less..things are looking good today! I definitely can get to 155 by the next wedding I attend. I would like to say I could get between 150-155 but I think 155 is a good goal to set and take anything extra as a reward. I've been way off on my goals for the last couple functions! Its good to be back on track though. That last plateau was torture! Just have to continue to push through. I'm down about 43 lbs from the beginning of the year, the last 27 are totally attainable!
I'm 2.2 lbs from my next reward.. dinner at Luigi's house. I still haven't used my last two restaurant rewards though. I really need to make them happen because I'm gyping myself big time. Although, the endless recognition from friends and family is the biggest reward I could ask for. The support is amazing and I'm so blessed to have it. I honestly don't think I could do it without them!

End of May measurements

My end of may measurements are 39-33-39.
So only the middle number is changing.
At least there's a change though, I cannot complain!
I cannot wait to reach my goal weight. There have been fluctuations in fat and water % but today my water is 52.6% and fat is 26.5%. I've upped my calories due to a suggestion from a fellow weight loser and good friend of mine. Since then its like the fat is falling off again! I think I very well might get all my weight off in the next 3 months. I'm hoping that when I discontinue nursing it won't all just swarm me back on!
I don't really know how that works.
I'll just have to continue to stay active and watch my calorie intake.
Things seem to be going fantastic right now though! Suppose to be hitting up maggianos for my cheat day Sunday!! Might be going to the cubs game Saturday as well. Its so hard when we go because Scot orders so much food!! But I really want maggianos! So I'm going to have to practice some of that self control. I'm excited for my weigh in tomorrow!

Water weight

My water % this morning is 52.4%. Its slowly on the rise. I thought a healthy water weight was anything over 50% but according to the chart that came with my scale, that is considered low. A good water % is actually around 56%. My fat % in turn is 26.8%. I'm already in a healthy fat % according to the chart but I have about 2.8% to go until I'm in the "fit" category. That's pretty awesome. Focusing on drinking enough water every day really helps.

I still don't think my midsection measurements have changed much. Measurements are tomorrow.
So we will see then!

Progress end of may

I skipped progress pics last week because I wasn't feeling fantastic. Today I'm feeling OK but my back is absolutely killing me. It doesn't look like exercise is in my near future.
I'll just have to do well to eat my best until then.
I have another wedding to attend in 18 days. Since I couldn't get down to 155 for the last one, I'd like to for this next one!

My progress pics are:
Beginning-middle-now

4 lbs til next reward!

Which will be dinner at Luigi's house at 155 lbs! Even though I have yet to eat at ju rin which was my 180 lb reward, and maggianos that was 165!
I can now wear size 12 jeans (or 11/12). My sister sent some to me when we met to pick up Jadyn yesterday. She also sent me some size 10s that I cannot yet get my butt into! In due time I will. And it will be very exciting! With the way the weather is going I may be wearing them in July.
I'm still feeling kind of sick today, it sucks. I think it'll be a nice chunk of time before I drink again.
Today we are grilling more shish kabobs outside. Tried them out yesterday and o my yummmm! Scot is making breakfast now and I'm in bed writing this with Jadyn playing next to me with the blanket. I wish every day could be like this one.
Well soon Scots job will be over and I guess I'll take that wish back! Lol
Yesterday was funny. I showed him what kind of engagement ring to buy me whenever he proposes. (Princess cut). And we saw some cubic zirconia ones and they were like 20 bucks. He told me to pick out one for each finger. It kind of hit my funny bone.
Well breakfast is ready! Enjoy your memorial days and remember what its all about! :)

The easiest vow to make

Is prolonged sobriety after one crazy night of drinking! It was a great night though. Everything was phenomenal at this wedding! The next day was beyond difficult. We went on a tour of Wrigley Field and I was top notch hung over. I threw up on the way there and held it together during the tour. It was really cool, by the way! We ate at sweet baby rays afterwards and it was delicious. I could hardly eat because my stomach was a mess but the few bites I managed were great. This morning I got on the scale and expected an increase despite yesterday but I'm finally over my hump! 159.2 lbs. I know its not weigh in day but I wanted to see the "damage". So yeah everything is great! Had a subway salad for breakfast. They are so good and hardly a single calorie. Now to enjoy the rest of the holiday weekend!!

Grrr sometimes...

Sometimes the harder you work the less results you see!
I was active all day yesterday and ate up to my calorie budget and burned almost half of it off.
So I wake up and get on the scale expecting big results and I'm now 162.2 lbs! Probably an effect of drinking Monday but the wedding is tomorrow.
I have a feeling I'm going to want to drink a little. Scot is going to get plastered and I don't feel like dealing with that.
I was hoping to be below 160 by tomorrow but even if I work out all day I'll probably just gain weight again. I wish I didn't drink Monday. I'm hoping the only positive effect of that is it will prevent me from drinking much tomorrow. I just have an all around bad feeling about alcohol and tomorrow. I hope I'm wrong and its a blast.
I guess the scale this morning was just a bad start to the day. I have to take Jadyn to the doctor in 3 hours because she has an infection in her toe so that's also going to suck. And then we are going to the rehearsal dinner. At least Jadyn will be there and I'll have valid reason to avoid drinking tonight and Scot too. We have to be up a little early for the wedding tomorrow. I basically won't even be spending time with Scot until 7pm. I'm kind of nervous about how he will be acting with and without me. Maybe the stress is making me put on weight again. I'll try to make time for a good stretch today.
my measurements are still 39-34-39. From last Friday, my weight has gone up .2 lbs, my water weight is still 51.9% but my fat is actually 27.4%. So I guess maybe a little of the gain is muscle. That makes me feel a little better. I'm going to weight myself tomorrow morning as well because Fridays are my actual weigh in days. I don't think I'm going to cheat today.

2 days til wedding

I'm not even close to reaching my goal of 155 by Friday! I'm just going to have to work as hard as I can these next 2 days. I have the dress I'm going to wear here. I'll have lost about 15 lbs since I first got it and wore it.

I'm feeling better today. My stomachs still slightly queezy after my breakfast sandwich but nothing compared to yesterday. Also, I'm feeling a little better about Scot. I kind of went through a slump and put myself through the test and realized I do really love him I'm just tired of the struggle. I want the good back so I'm going to work for that and stop holding the grudges that have been haunting me for so long.
Its just something that needed to happen.
I'm hoping things continue down the right path for us and our therapy sessions only continue to help us.

Today I just feel like the weight of gloom has lifted off of me and I'm ready to be happy :)

I'll probably weigh in both tomorrow and Friday just because tomorrow is the rehearsal dinner and I'm not sure if I'll cheat during it, but will definitely be cheating Friday. Still don't know about drinking though. I don't want to feel like crap during the Wrigley tour Saturday.

So sick..

I went out last night and drank too much. Now I feel awful. It kind of makes me not want to drink Friday for the wedding.
If I go...
Me and Scot are hardly speaking.

I'll have to weigh myself in the morning. I'm sure I went up because I ate like a pig yesterday on top of the drinks.

Back on track once more. I'm forcing myself to eat even though its really hard because I'm so queezy!

Not much else to say today other than ick

A new week

I tried on my skirts last night and they fit me so much better than when I first got them! They're size 11s and I've been in size 14s so that's really cool. I kind of wanted to happy cry when I saw how good they looked!

Scots sisters wedding is in 4 days. I know I won't reach my goal of 155 by then, but I'm confident I will be below 160. That's more than I originally could have hoped for!

I'm going to wear a dress that I last wore when I was at least 15 lbs heavier. So it'll look nice now. It actually looked nice then too so I'm sure it'll just look that much better.

Today I'm hoping to use one of my massages. It'd be nice if that burned calories. Relax and lose weight :)
I know after my Swedish massage in las Vegas my masseuse said that I wouldn't be able to feed Jadyn for a while because the toxins would be coming out everywhere. So at least it was a detox. The deep tissue massages might be different but that's what I need most. I need to relax and de-stress more than anything.
Too much has been going on in my life. My heart is feeling about 80% better though. The iron pills are doing their job!

I'm feeling good today.

Bored n ignored

I tried so many times yesterday to make conversation with Scot and he just had nothing to say. And this morning he got mad that I touched his cheek in a loving manner. What more can I do? Its like he hates my guts and I don't understand why.
I went to his nieces birthday last night, just like I go to all of his stuff and never complain. If its something for me and my family, I never hear the end of how "I don't see why we have to go".

I'm going home today and that's all there is to it. I'm so tired of feeling like no matter what I do I'll never be good enough.

I don't have much to say. Obviously I won't be drinking today. I ate cake yesterday as my cheat meal and I'm sure I gained weight. Now I just want to go be with my family and friends and be active and happy.

I want to try on my skirts too!

Feeling great today!

So I still haven't decided if I want to use tomorrow as a cheat day or not. I wouldn't drink many beers and would most likely still count the calories. We would only be at the bar for a couple hours. Who knows if I would really have fun? I'm already starting to talk myself out of it. I don't think Scot really wants to go. I don't know. One more day to decide, but I weighed myself just in case.
Weight- 160.4 lbs
Fat- 27.1%
Water- 52.1%

I love that my water % rises as I lose weight. That tells me I'm not temporarily just losing water!
And even though I'm .4 over 160, I still consider that close enough for my second reward!!! I want to try my skirts on now :)

I'm so excited about my progress.
Also, we finally went grocery shopping yesterday and I picked out some healthy snacks and foods for my meals. I think I'm going to try a special k breakfast sand which for breakfast and cottage cheese with peaches or Strawberry's for my first snack mmm! I'm excited to eat hahaha.

My sister is suppose to come over today but not sure about that because I'm supposed to go to Scots nieces bday party after he's off work.
I don't really like eating over there because it's too hard for me to count calories and no matter what little portions I eat, I end up going over my limit. They must use butter like Paula Dean!
Then if I gain tomorrow I won't know if it's because I over ate or if my body's acting weird again! And I don't want to starve myself all day just so I don't have to worry about what I eat tonight.
The internal struggles of a dieting woman!

Whatever is decided about today and tomorrow.. I'm loving today's numbers!

Technically it is weigh in day..

I might also weigh in tomorrow if I take my cheat day Sunday.
Today's weight is 162 even.
51.9% water, 27.5% fat.
With the fluctuations of the water.. I've really only lost about 5% fat I think.
My water weight was just very low in the beginning.
That's still pretty good though!
I have 2 lbs until my next reward. Basically all I'm going to be doing is trying on some old summer clothes from 3 years ago. The thing is that 3 years ago I weighed more than I do now so I'm just hoping the clothes will fit me better than they did then..
One jean skirt I had was a size 12, that might be a bit too big now because I remember that skirt had fit me perfectly at the time.
Its the other ones that I'm crossing my fingers for. They had elastic bands that kind of dug into me. I'm not really sure what to expect with them right now.
Its still 2 lbs away though which really could take about 2 weeks to reach.
I'm hoping I can wear one to Scots sisters rehearsal dinner though.
It'll be fun going through my closet and trying on things I haven't fit into in forever!
I still haven't used my 165 reward of maggianos. I'll have to set that up for hopefully two weekends away.
I know I'll need a cheat day to go there!
My 155 reward is to eat at this amazing Italian restaurant called Luigi's house.
That could still be months away though. First I would just like to focus on reaching 160 so I can try my skirts on!
I need to do some change up exercises I think. Now that I'm not sore anymore I can work harder.
I was in such a bad mood yesterday. Hopefully today will be better!
I still haven't made a 100% decision for Sunday though. Scot kind of made a big damn deal out of everything and said he'd rather skip the bar and go to his band practice. If that's what he's going to do then I'm not going and I won't be drinking. The following weekend is his sisters wedding anyway and I'm sure I'll be drinking that day. Its rare for me to drink two weekends in a row so we will see. I want to focus on a more positive attitude today :)

Measuring day

First of all, I wish I had a professional measuring me so I would know that I'm doing it right!
And using a tape measure can't be 100% accurate because it kind of has to bend in odd ways and doesn't conform to the body. But I've done my best!
My measurements today are 39-34-39.
Prior weeks they were 38-35-39.
OK so its great that the middle number went down but I highly doubt the first number should be going up!
I need a measuring rope because that just seems odd to me.

I still haven't decided whether I should weigh in Friday or Saturday either. I'm really on the fence about whether or not I'm going to go out Sunday. Part of me wants to but the other part of me wants to be with Jadyn.

I think I've just kind of given up on spending time with Scot. I think we need a romantic getaway to rekindle some of the feelings I seem to be losing. I feel like a wall has gone up and there's nothing he can really do to hurt me anymore. Which I guess is good but it shouldn't be this way. Besides, he'd never agree to anything romantic. Las Vegas was suppose to be our anniversary trip and he actually left me black out drunk somewhere I didn't know where I was..so he could get pizza! How romantic and thoughtful. You are so welcome for carrying and delivering your baby and dedicating every moment of my life to make sure she is happy and healthy! Oh how great appreciation feels!
But let's face it..he didn't want it to be our trip..he wanted it to be his trip! Which is why he ditched me to play golf 2 out of the 4 days we were there. Happy freakin anniversary hunny!
Right..

Maybe by Sunday I'll feel like going but right now I'm having a hard time seeing the point. We never spend time together as it is. He works all day and comes home and spends all evening working on the yard.
The therapist says we need to make time for each other and not just time where he's criticizing me.
Even when we do have time together, I try talking to him and he just ignores me. He either is listening to the radio, watching TV (even on dinner dates), updating his fantasy team on his phone, or focused on working outside and gets angry if I try talking to him.
We only communicate while he's at work and texts me the same thing everyday "love and miss you guys".
Do you really?

I think our first therapy session just really opened up my eyes. The therapist told Scot, "if you really love her as much as you claim to, every little thing she does wouldn't annoy you".
But it does!
At the session I talked about how I have to defend myself everyday and he just criticized me.
Am I really so awful?
I do everything he asks me to and take care of the baby. I put myself very last on the list and its still not good enough.

I could keep trying or I could just say screw it. I guess that's how I feel about Sunday right now. I'll put some thought into it.

Counseling..

What did I learn?
So far when we fight, before the explosion happens, one of us is suppose to say "time out" and then we go and do separate things for a little under and hour..no more than an hour!.. and come back and resolve the issue. Not just sweep it under the rug!

Also when speaking with each other we are supposed to say "I feel.." instead of "you do this..." we are suppose to practice that in normal conversation.
However on the way home we got into a fight and I realized he did say "you do this..." and that's what offends me. So the therapist is right but he just totally ignored that part of therapy I guess.

Its only going to work if we both apply what we learn so we will see how he does with that!

Anyway!!

I was too sore to work out yesterday. My lower body is killing me!
My water % is almost 52%! Its 51.9% which is nuts because I think when I first used the scale it was 46%? That's a wonderful health change!!

I do need to try to get a good work out in today but I'm so sore! It hurts to move. I don't know how people work through their soreness. I have yet to master that, I guess.

Tomorrow is measurements and Friday is weigh in. I think I'm going to use my cheat day for Sunday though. Probably will have a few beers.
Does that mean I should weigh in Saturday? I don't know.
I don't think I will be 155 lbs by his sisters wedding but that's OK. I'm still happy with my progress.

I'll have to post a pic of me in my dress so I can compare it to my last couple.

2nd May progress pic

The way I did this weeks progress pic was my very first pic-last weeks pic-this weeks pic.
I did it that way because there's about a 5 lb difference between this and last week. I'm curious to see what that difference is!
I haven't been sleeping as well as I was. Jadyn hasn't been sleeping through the night lately. I know that will begin to affect my progress. I'll just continue to do my stretches.
My back is all sorts of messed up so I'm thinking I need to make a massage appointment as well.
My first therapy session is tonight at 8pm. I'm nervous because I don't know if it'll awaken more feelings of anger. But I'm excited because this might actually help us. All I can do is pray for the best.
I have high hopes and mostly a positive attitude. I feel every day as the iron pills are increasing my health. Its wonderful! I never should've stopped taking them after I had the baby but I'm the kind of person who kind of under plays things if I feel fine. Its not the wisest way to live! But I'm working on that. I'm just glad that now I know my heart wasn't affected by how much weight I've lost in such a little time.

I'm going to post the pics now and eat some cereal because I'm hungry and we actually have a little food here now! Not much, but enough! :)

Iron pills and counseling

I did buy the iron pills and have been taking them for two days. I feel way less palpitations and the ones I do feel aren't as painful as they were before. A few more days and I'm golden.
Yesterday was my first mothers day and a massive cheat day.
Baker square for lunch with some red velvet pie. Then cooked out for dinner. Had 2 smores before bed. So I'm sure I've gained. Its a good thing I only weigh in once a week now!
Hopefully I'll be under 162.4 this week!
I'm excited for my progress pic tomorrow.

Scot and I are trying one last time.
We have our first counseling session set up for tomorrow night. I will blog about it Wednesday morning for anyone who is interested..

Yesterday at his game he tried ordering me a Jersey in males xl. Everyone was freaking out on him saying how huge it'd be on me and that if I want a men's jersey I need to get a small. It felt so good to hear! I wore my winter coat that my dad bought for me Christmas 2011 and it was tight on me. Now its huge on me! I love it. Its the first time in years that I've looked in the mirror and said out loud "wow! I look good!!!"
I know it'll only get better from here!

An old friend of mine texted me yesterday asking if I really believe I'll reach 130 lbs. And I told him yes I weighed it once and I can do it again!
he responded "I use to weigh 100 lbs. It doesn't mean I ever will again!"
And I told him "I'm not trying to weigh 100 lbs, I'm trying to weigh 130. I have lost 40 lbs this year and only have 30 more to go! Not only is it possible but I'm going to do it"
I can't believe he texted me to discourage me.
But you know what?
I'm not doing this to please him. I'm doing it to please myself and to have better health for my baby girl.
However, once I reach 130 I will have no problem sending him a photo with a great big smug smile lol.

Anemia

So I realized my heart palpitations are due to stress but also due to anemia. I'm buying an iron supplement today and its suppose to help in just a couple days.
My weight today is 162.4 lbs. Since I couldn't really weigh in Friday.
being my first mothers day I'll probably take a cheat day though until my palpitations stop I'm staying away from alcohol and caffeine.
But that problem will soon be gone. 2.4 lbs until my next reward! Happy mothers day!!

More baby daddy drama

I really don't see it working out with him. Children can't raise children and I'm really sick of the physical and emotional abuse. I told myself I'd never put up with cheating or abuse and he has done both.
Its time for me to fly..

I'm camping right now with my family to get away from him so I don't have my scale. Guilty to admit, I did weigh myself yesterday. I was 163.8. So yeah my gain was from my monthly friend.

Right now I'm wearing clothes I haven't fit in since college. Its pretty awesome! My cheat day is suppose to be tomorrow but if I don't have my scale I don't know if I want to take it tomorrow or wait a couple more days.

I'm just so tired. As hard as I try to do well for myself, Scot is just such an ass. I can't handle it. I just really can't. He's like a big mass of harassment hovering over me 24/7. And then calls me insecure. I tell him actually no I'm not insecure. I like myself! I've reached several goals so far this year and am looking and feeling awesome about myself! I'm the best mom possible for Jadyn. My life is all about her and she is a healthy and happy little girl. I see nothing there to be insecure about!
No, insecure is when you don't like yourself. Him not liking me doesn't make me insecure it makes him an asshole!!!!!!!!! And he will be a lonely one. He can lie all he wants but to who it matters, they won't believe him. I hate that I'm in this situation. I hate him for not being a man. I have so much rage! I forgave him time after time when I never should have. What did that leave me with? More room for him to do more shit. Ridiculous! I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing. That is: getting healthy for Jadyn and keeping her healthy and happy. Scot can deal with himself.

Measuring

My measurements are exactly what they were last week.
38-35-39..

I don't take that as a sign of zero progress. Honestly I know my legs are my biggest improvement but like I said before, not my focal point.

That doesn't mean that I'm unhappy about my progress. I'm thrilled! So very soon it'll be time to pull out those skirts. I want to say I was 10-15lbs more than I am now when I use to wear them.
They were a bit tight around the waist but by 160 I think they will fit excellently! I'm really looking forward to trying them out.

I still need to use my maggianos gift card too but we will see where I'm at tomorrow for my weigh in day.
I've been working very hard this week since my two cheat days!
I think I might work my ab exercises back into my routine so that my measurements actually change weekly.

I'm using a tape measure instead of a tape rope so I know that does make a difference but we can only use the tools available to us. Maybe I can find one at Ross or something. Wouldn't hurt to look!

Dark chocolate <3

Is what I'm eating right now. We still haven't gone grocery shopping so my breakfast today is Moser Roth's dark chocolate and organic Bunny grahams. Plus a bottle of water.
The work outs went well yesterday. I ended up doing a 10 min kick box with a 10 min destress stretch. I might try to add a bit more today but right now I feel the destress exercises are best for me right now.
Its so weird for me not to weigh in every day anymore! I only have 2 days though. I can hold out. Then my measure in is tomorrow again already!
I am feeling encouraged. I am looking forward to trying on my skirts when I reach 160. The way the weather keeps going, it looks like it'll be just in time!
I can't remember the skirt sizes. They were either 12s or larges maybe? I haven't worn them in 2 years because I was pregnant last year so I don't remember.
Either way I'll feel like I'm out of 14s. My friend Katie keeps insisting that I try on her size 10s but she forgets I've got the big hips and big butt build. She's got the naturally small frame. She's in 4s now though so at least I'll get free clothes when I get to size 10! Hahaha. Hopefully when jean season returns I'll be in 8s or under though.
Any progress is progress! I'm happy to have made it as far as I've been blessed to. It's so exciting. I am so excited!

According to the lose it app (which I highly recommend for anyone and everyone trying to lose weight) I am doing a biggest loser challenge. So far I've lost 15% of my body weight. That is really awesome!
If I have managed to accomplish this much in just a few months, I can't wait to see the progress I've made in one year!

Its unbelievable that at the start of the year I was 200 lbs and now I'm in the mid 160s. I'm so happy!

3 month progress pic

I can't say I've progressed since my last weeks pic or even the week before! But definitely have in the past 3 months. Scot took off work yesterday so I didn't stick as closely to my diet as I'm wanting to then. Today is a different story! I plan on doing 2-3 10 min vigorous fat burning exercises. My hearts been feeling funny again. Totally stressing out about things. I keep getting bills sent to me, now for things I wasn't even a part of! Maybe I should start yoga again. It helped me last time.
We are looking at houses again to move. This time very close to my friends and family! I'm so excited. I am really crossing my fingers and praying this happens! One house is right in front of a park. I'd be able to walk with Jadyn daily and take her to go play. It would make life slightly easier!

Lets call it a cheat weekend!

Last night was an amazing success. So many people showed up and we all had an incredible time!
One of Scots friends even complimented me on my weight loss so that was a success too!
We now have an overabundancy of beer and Mexican food! So, needless to say I'm going to need to take an additional cheat day. The food is incredible. The mess is a nightmare.
We have just about everything cleaned up though. I just need to do the dishes. The drain is clogged, which seems to happen after every party we have here, so its going to have to wait.
Last night was the best though for real. My mom took the baby when she went home and I'm going to pick her up tomorrow. As difficult as the girl can be sometimes, I already miss her horribly. I'll end up waking up super early tomorrow and driving to sycamore!

I'm considering upping my caloric intake while I'm still nursing. I'm afraid she's missing out on some nutrients. Then again, she's 19 lbs 11 oz and 27.5 inches long at 6 months old so she's probably not haha!

We will see...

Also, a little tmi but my monthly friend came yesterday so now I know why I was gaining weight. So tomorrow I'll be back on track. Also I can start my workouts again because I have my living room back!

I would like to be 155 lbs by Kari's wedding on May 24th. That leaves me about 3 weeks. Hopefully the weight will start melting off again once I pick back up tomorrow.
I'm excited to kick start more weight loss!

I'll need all the energy I can get. Jadyn will be crawling soon and getting into everything. I'll never be able to sit down. I'm excited though. I can't believe two of her teeth have cut through now! She's getting so big! <3

Yay party day!

I'm 6.4 lbs over my goal weight for today but that's OK!!
I still have done really well these past few months and that is worth celebrating!
I'm so tired right now that its hard to imagine that the party day is finally here. We bought 4 cases of beer, a bottle of patron, and bottle of honey Jim beam. I still think I should stay away from shots though. Now if I have one after I've been already drinking I black out almost immediately. Its not good! My tolerance just isn't what it use to be. Number one, I've lost weight. Number two, I only get to drink every other Saturday. And I only drink to get drunk every other month! So its a big lifestyle change than where I was before Jadyn.
The eaten part of the diet has grown on me too. It doesn't feel like a diet at all to me! I do need this cheat day though. There is going to be sooooo much food!!! Two types of pork, sausage, chicken and beef. Veggie pizza which I'm so excited for. Tacos with the meat. Taco dip and guacamole. Rice, I believe. I have to shred lettuce and dice up onions and tomatoes today. I have a few people heading over early to help me which makes me feel really good! So many people are looking forward to this party and that's more than I could've asked for. I will still be about 35 lbs less than when I've seen a lot of people that are coming. 10 lbs less even than some I've seen a month and a half ago. Its a change. I feel good!
Then tomorrow Scot and I have a cubs game to go to. I'm going to be all decked out and majorly hung over.
My mom bought me a bunch of cubs apparel for mother's day. Hopefully it will be a nice day for us.

I wish it was a night game but its OK.
Hopefully I'll be able to get Scot up and moving for it. I have a feeling he's going to get belligerent tonight. The good thing is that all my friends are bad asses and if they see him do anything stupid they'd probably punch him before I could. I'm having faith in him that he's learned his lesson though and doesn't want to risk losing me and Jadyn. I can't afford to get hurt like that again. Its still eating me up from last time. I think my heart would just give up if it happened again and stop beating all together.

I'm going to stick to positive thinking.
Today is going to be a great day and I need to eat breakfast because I'm starving lol.

Have a fun and safe "quattro de mayo!"

Last weigh in before the party

Today I am 167.2 lbs so at least I haven't gained anymore! I'm still heavier than I was a week ago but its just a minor set back. I should've taken a cheat day last weekend but I will tomorrow.
I'm so excited!
Today I have to go grocery shopping for the food and beverages for tomorrow.
My mom is coming back today and going to help me clean the house. My bedroom is a functioning bedroom again.
Then, one of the friends I've made out here is coming over to help me cook. I think my cousin might as well.
There's suppose to be probably between 30-35 people coming tomorrow! Some from st. Charles, Chicago, champaign, and from around here. A couple might even be coming from as far as Michigan to attend! I'm so excited to see everyone and have a blast. Being a young mom, these oppertunities are very rare. I might step on the scale in the morning just to see how close I actually came to reaching my goal for tomorrow. I'm 7.2 lbs off as of now. By the end of May I would like to be 157 lbs. I think that would be a consistent drop.
Recap from last night:
I decided to start weekly measurements since I've gained weight this week.
38-35-39
That's bust-abs-waist.
I'll measure again next Thursday.
My scale is going bizarre for water and fat %. I could step on the scale 5 times in a row and they'd fluctuate every time.
Mostly it reads that my fat % is 28.3 and water is 51.3.

Measurements

So since I've been gaining I feel the need to start measuring!
Here's what I got tonight..
Bust- 38
Stomach (around the belly button)- 35
Waist- 39.

That's where I will continue to measure.
I really should be doing full body since I know for a complete fact that my legs have changed drastically, but I feel that my biggest problem area is my mid-region so that is where I will continue to stay focused!

But I'm going to take my measurements in the morning every Thursday so that I'm not super bloated from drinking soda and what not.

Seems like a decent schedule.
Progress pics Tuesdays
Measurements Thursdays
Weigh in Fridays
Cheat day Saturdays!

2 days until party!

I wish my scale took muscle %. My fat and water % have been the same for 3 days but I've gained 2 lbs. If its not fat or water I can only assume that its muscle!
Yesterday morning I did a 1 hour long cardio blast workout. It was rough. I thought for sure it would get me back on track! Afterwards I shopped 2 hours with my mom and brother. We walked around the mall. I bought decorations for the party and glow in the dark beer pong cups/balls.
We did get ice cream but I had probably less than a scoop of sugar free turtle ice cream. We then ate Chinese for dinner. I have to tell you, I have never lost weight from eating Chinese!!
I know that I'm not going to be touching those leftovers!
We really need to go grocery shopping. I think fruits and vegetables would really help right now. We just don't have time with trying to get our house ready for the party. The bedroom floor will be done today, and then we can move the furniture back. So I'll just have a lot of cleaning to do tomorrow. People are still rsvping so I know it'll be a nice turn out.
The cubs game the day after will be a little brutal. I really wish I had looked at our tix before setting up the party day.
Oh well! I'll probably just need to down a bloody Mary or two.
I've decided that my weigh in days should be Fridays instead of every day. My cheat days will be Saturdays.
Cheat days are so important. I believe I skipped my last one. I was going to wait for the party, but it did more harm than good. Without taking my measurements or having a muscle % scale, I can't feel very good about this weeks results.

Skipping a day

So even with my work out yesterday I gained weight.
My fat and water percentage are the same as yesterday.
Today I'm 166.4 lbs.
I am feeling pretty upset about it. I don't know how I'm gaining weight!
Usually now is when I would take a cheat day but Saturday is my cheat day so I will have to wait.
I'll try eating differently today.
Aggravated!